Mario: Okay, I am geared up! I am ready for Top 10 Reasons Why Time Traveling is No Good! Fafa: Yeah, but remember, it's not the obvious reasons, like the world exploding.
It's the little reasons.
Future Mario: I come from the future to stop you from doing this blog! Present Mario: You shut up, future me! I do not trust you! Future Fafa: See? Time traveling's frustrating! Present Fafa: That should be reason number one! Both Marios: Yaaaay! Fafa: Number 10– Fafa: Number 10– You could meet yourself.
Mario: Wait! This one is obvious! If you meet your own self, the world will explode! (time warp) Fafa: No, it won't, but it will be really depressing.
Past Mario: I am wearing this two prong! (time warp) Past Mario: I am wearing this two prong! Present Mario: Oh, man! I thought I used to be cool, but I was stupid! Past Mario: This is the best! (time warp) Present Mario: Oh, man! I am going to look like crap! Future Mario: This is the worst! Number 9– Number 9– You WILL show up naked.
(Terminator music playing) Mario: What? No, you don't! Fafa: Yeah, you do.
Look at Arnold Schwarzenegger.
(“The Girl from Ipanema”) Terminator: Your clothes.
Give them to me.
Mario: But Doctor Who travels through time all the time and he does not show up naked! Fafa: Yeah, he does.
The BBC cuts out all the willies and naughty bits.
Mario: They WHAT?!?! Fafa: OUT! They cut OUT! Number eight: Number eight– You are unemployable.
With your current job skills, you can't get a job in the past.
(time warp) .
or in the future.
Mario: Well, I write blogs for a living! Past Interviewer: Ha ha ha! You can't make a living doing that! Mario: Well, I write blogs for a living! Future Interviewer: Ha ha ha! You still write? Fafa: Number 7– Fafa: Number 7– You can't buy anything.
Mario: Hello, may I have McRib sandwich please? Past Cashier: Ha ha ha, I can't break a 20! Mario: Hello, may I have McRib sandwich please? Future Cashier: Certainly, that will be $64, 000.
Fafa: Number 6A– Fafa: Number 6A– The past is gross.
(plop) Mario: Everything is covered in feces! Fafa: Number 6B– Fafa: Number 6B– In the future, you're gross.
Mario: There is nowhere to take a feces! Fafa: Number five– Fafa: Number five– You'll kill everyone, or they'll kill you.
We use medicines that keep getting better to stop from catching colds.
Mario: I hate colds! Fafa: You think you hate today's colds? What about the colds from the future that you're not protected against? (time warp) Future Groundhogs: Welcome to the future! (sneezes) (Mario exclaims; falls) Future Groundhogs: Uhhh.
Mario: Screw that! I'll just go to the past! (time warp) Past Groundhogs: Welcome to the past! (Mario sneezes) (Past Groundhogs exclaim; fall down) (Mario exclaims) Fafa: Number four– Fafa: Number four– Don't trust the landscape.
Time and space are kind of linked.
See, landscapes can change in a matter of– (Mamma Mia ringtone) Hold on a second.
(answers phone) Hello? Mario: Fafa, it's me.
Apparently, they finish that sidewalk a month in the future.
Will I grow feet again when I get back? Fafa: (on the phone) Uhh, maybe? Mario: (on the phone) TIME TRAVEL SUCKS! (Huey Lewis and the News – “The Power of Love”) Number three– Number three– The music stinks.
You know your smelly Uncle Bob who won't listen to anything but Van Halen and says, “Today's music's stupid! Why don't you try out some Van Halen?” That's you when you time travel.
Mario: Oh, dear Lord! They will not stop playing “Come On Eileen”! Stupid! (dubstep playing) Oh, dear Lord! I thought dubstep would go away! Stupid! Fafa: Number two– Fafa: Number two– It'll hurt your brain.
Okay, if I kill Hitler, that would be good.
Unless, by doing that, I somehow create Zombie Hitler.
What if it creates an alternate reality with twenty Hitlers?! I can't take this anymore! I'm going home to play Xbox! And number one– And number one– Time travel is frustrating.
No matter when you go, you can't change nothing.
It's super frustrating.
Mario: I will change something! Fafa: No, Mario, you can't.
I'm telling you; you're just gonna frustrate yourself.
Mario: Shut up! Watch this! (time warp) (rewinding) (time warp) Present Mario: I've come from the future to stop you from doing this blog! Past Mario: You shut up, future me! I do not trust you! Present Fafa: See? Time traveling's frustrating! Past Fafa: That should be reason number one! Both Marios: Yaaaay! (Huey Lewis and the News – “Back in Time”) (party horn; crunch).